Could I do it any other way?
I think not! Though I did try disposables for about a month.
And they really weren't all that bad, though quite stinky (I believe it was the type of diaper, not just because they are disposies).
So far Elias lives in flats and plastic pants, although he does have a couple pairs of homemade longies, (thanks to Allison and Cathy - you sisters are awesome!), and 4 pairs of something made by Wonder Works. I tried to figure out what they are, and I believe they are pocket diapers (or something along those lines). So since Elias is sorely low on covers (and well, what is a cloth diaper with out a cover to keep in all the nasties?) I typed "make your own diaper cover", into google's search bar.
Now I am stoked to get started on what I discovered! Mind you, at the sewing machine I really have no idea what I am doing, but I have faith in a few good friends, (that don't yet know about this), who are wizzes with their machines!
So in honor of my new "love", I thought I would post up the sites with the patterns I've come across so that if any of you ladies are interested, you can try them out yourself. If you do, please let me know how they turn out! As soon as I get to Goodwill, print out the patterns, and have someone teach me what a 'zig zag stitch' is, I'll post pictures of the finished product and give you a little report on my experience :)
K so here are the sites:
http://katrinassqs.blogspot.com/2007/10/free-soaker-pattern.html <- she has a TON of patterns. Ok, well she has more than one. And I am very excited about trying her fleece pattern!
http://marthasworld76.blogspot.com/2007/05/how-to-make-wool-soaker-from-recycled.html
<- cute way of making longies
http://www.borntolove.com/frugal-column2.html <- though it seems that the directions are missing some possible key points, I am excited to try out her method. Another site directed me to her's and that woman said these were exceptionally easy.
Woo-hoo! Now who wants to teach me how to sew?!
Monday, April 26, 2010
Monday, April 19, 2010
Birth story of an almost homebirth
Elias James, Jan. 4th, 7:33 a.m. 9 lbs 2 oz 21 in, one small tear that needed a stitch, and no episiotomy :)
My son was 'due' December 24th, but other than BH, there were no signs labor was soon approaching. Finally on the morning of Jan. 2nd I woke up with a bit of show. I was so excited I immediately called my MW and doula! They both were greatly encouraged, seeing how this first baby of mine was taking awhile to show any signs that he would actually come out.
By 7, that night, I felt my first real contraction. My DH and I were watching a movie while I bounced around on the exercise ball, (baby was turned around and face up). I didn't tell him right away, but waited about a half an hour to see if these ones were the real deal. When I told him, my DH was so excited he said that we needed to call my mom, who lives in AK, and tell her to catch the next flight! I told him we needed to time them first, than call the MW, than if after we talked she thinks this was real labor, maybe than call my mom.
7:30 we started timing them and the time between was by no means consistent, but they were still coming! *thank the Lord*! We called the MW, she said it sounded like labor, told me to call my mom, and try to get some sleep.
I tried to lay down in the bed but there was a terrible constant pain in my lower back. So instead I sat upright on the couch and tried my best to sleep. I did pretty well, though every once in awhile a really strong contraction would rudely awaken me
By 8 the next day, (the 3rd), my in-laws were picking up my mom from the airport and coming back to our place. My mom rushed into the apartment, gave me a BIG kiss on the head and I instantly felt as though I could now have my baby.
We were planning on having the baby out our doula/friend's house, so we packed everything up and by 10:30 a.m. were on our way. At this point contractions were getting stronger, but I could talk through 96% of them.
We arrived at my doula's, and began setting everything up.
Timed contractions again and by the afternoon they were about 6 - 7 min. apart, and still totally bearable. I mean so much so that I even thought, 'well if this is labor, I am definitely made to have babies!' Little did I know, the tough stuff just hadn't showed up yet
My wonderful support team, (minus the MW, she didn't come until about 6 pm), took wonderful care of me during this super easy part of labor. I mean they were awesome at distracting me from the pain, talking with me, checking on me, feeding me, and making me go to the bathroom every hour on the hour.
About 3 we timed contractions again. They had spread out a little, but were getting more powerful. The spasm in my back also continued to get more intense. My support team were taking turns trying desperately to get the muscle to calm down, but all their efforts only aggravated it more. When this first began I thought it was back labor, but after I described it to my MW, she said that it was just some lumbar muscle that I must have strained sometime before labor began. Needless to say, I was not so happy about this added pain.
3:30 the whole house decided to take a nap. I tried also, but contractions were now strong enough that I could not sleep. I could still enjoy the company of other's, so I sat up with my doula and she prayed over my back. I think I remember it letting up a little, but not for long.
During all this the baby was still not rotating.
6 p.m. (ish), my MW arrives and decides she wants to check me. Because of testing pos. for Group B Strep, this was the first time I had been checked during this pregnancy. Amazingly I was already 100% effaced and at a "stretchable" 6 cm. My MW was impressed. She said that whatever my body had been doing for the weeks leading up to actual labor, had worked! I was pretty impressed too, seeing how labor still really wasn't hurting and I was more than half way there to having my baby. While checking me she tried her best to turn the baby, but he wouldn't budge. She also predicted he would be about 8-14, and said I had "plenty" of room to have this baby. She strapped me to the monitors, and baby's heart beat was strong, before, during, and after, contractions. There were no worries what-so-ever, this baby and his mama were doing great!
After she checked me, we sat down to have a little talk about the distance my doula's home was from the nearest hospital. Unknowingly we were planning to have this baby about 20 miles from any hospital, a distance that was just not comfortable for my MW. So after talking, I decided to take us all back to mine and DH's apartment. Also during our hour long conversation labor suddenly became more intense than anything I had ever felt before. My legs began to shake and I rocked my hips back and forth while holding fastly to the bed post. I also started breathing deeper and with more intention than before. It was good that I was warned this was going to happen, seeing how my MW had said that checking me was probably going to speed up labor. To that all I can say, "um. Yes it did!"
So while everyone was eating dinner, my wonderful DH announced, for me, that we were going to head back to our place. My support team, again showing me how wonderful they were, quickly re-packed everything and put it, and me, in the car. The ride back was quite a bit more difficult than the ride out. DH hit a couple of bumps that made me cringe a bit, but that was unfortunate seeing how it only seemed to happen right at the peak of a contraction
By 8:30 (ish) we were back home. I got down on hands and knees to try to get the baby to wiggle himself free from his unfavorable position. My mom popped in a DVD slideshow of pictures from the brother's wedding that I had missed (due to being too close to due day), and my water broke. I was rocking my hips and felt a huge contraction. With the contraction came a intense pressure. At first I thought the pressure was gas, and I was mortified that I might 'fart' in front of all these people, (yes I am that kind of a women that no one, and I mean NO ONE, hears me toot - which is what I prefer to call it). At the peak of the contraction and pressure feeling, and me with a scared look of pain and embarrassment, a big huge gush of water came flowing. I told everyone that it was the most amazing feeling I had ever felt before in my life, and well, it was, at least up until the part when the baby came out.
They quickly helped me out of my laboring pajamas and started the bath. I wasn't sure if I was having the baby in the water, but I at least wanted to be in it since I knew labor was just about to get a whole lot harder.
At 9 (ish) I got into the tub, and from about there on than on out, all things are a blur of time, faces, and pain. At some point during being in the tub I was given cut up apples with peanut butter, on a plate. I don't even think I ate one of the slices, (such a waste!), because later I saw a picture & it was put aside and it looked like everything was still on it from when it was given to me.
About 10 they got me out the tub to go to the bathroom again. I would have to admit that going to the bathroom, during labor, was one of my least favorite memories. For some reason it just made all the pain that much worse whenever I had to squat down to meet the toilet. After that not working out, they helped me change into something dry and than my mom lead me the 5 feet from the bathroom to the bedroom. Now contractions were definitely strong enough that without her strong arms holding me up, I would not have been able to walk to the bedroom.
In the bed room they started me trying lots of different positions to get the baby to move. He was not only backwards, but also higher than they would have liked to see this far into labor.
With my hubby in front of me, his knees on the ground, leaning forward on to the bed, I got on my hands and knees and held tightly unto his hands. This was probably my favorite memory from labor. Though it was hard, and everything a blur, as long as my husband was right there, right in front of me with his forehead against mine, I felt I could handle the pain. Later we moved to me sitting on the bed, on my knees, & sort of propped up against him while he sat on the exercise ball behind me, this I also liked. They checked me again and though it had only been a couple hours since my water broke, I was 9 cm with just a lip - anytime now! In fact they thought for sure I would have the baby by midnight.
Midnight of Jan. 4th rolls around and we're still doing the same dance, propped up against my hubby. My MW asked me if I wanted to get up and go pee again, but seeing how I hadn't been having any luck with that, she asked if I would prefer to do a catheter. And seeing how I absolutely despised trying to sit on the toilet, I opted for the cath. Unfortunately it didn't quite work out, because the baby's head was sitting on my urethra. My MW said that she could feel the tube hitting his head as she tried to put it in, and it just couldn't push past it. We did our best, though, and my bladder emptied a little, but I still had quite the pooch of what would not come out. By this time the baby had finally moved a little, now he was sideways, but she couldn't tell which way he was facing. He had so much hair that my MW could not find the fontanel line.
So they threw me back in the tub, this time with all the lights off, no people around, and me with my back pressed against the wall and my legs up, as if they were in stir ups. My MW sat in front of me and helped me hold my position by being the brace I pressed my feet against. She said this was a sure fire way of getting the baby to turn the rest of the way because my hips were most open in this position. I have to tell you though, it was extremely painful. I don't know if that was the case because of the awkwardness of the position, or because the baby was moving, or because now I was in the transition faze and nothing seemed to be happening, but regardless, during this time is when I felt as though I could not handle anymore. Later my husband came in and I told him that I thought I needed to go to the hospital because I needed an epidural. Being the wonderful, and practical, man that he is, he loving encouraged me that I "could do this".
My MW also helped me during this time by talking me through what I was feeling, and what was now happening in my body. She would tell me to just relax every muscle in my body, all the muscles that are not needed for getting the baby out, let your arms go limp, release the tension in your back, and breath deep. She told me to work with the baby, feel him turning inside, try to help him turn by relaxing everything. If it had not been for her in there to talk me through that part, I know for certain I would have had them call the ambulance, it really was that unbearable.
Now I must give glory to God at this point, because He really was with me through every single step of the way. I felt His presence holding me up, strengthening and encouraging me through out the entire labor. At this point in the tub my contractions were pretty much back to back, and so overwhelmingly powerful that in my mind I would cry out to God and ask Him for give me a break. I would cry out, and He would respond. Everytime I asked for a break, He gave it to me. It was like He was saying, "I am right here my beloved, I'm not leaving you alone in this very difficult place. Here is a break, so that you can re-gain your strength and continue on." During these breaks, however long they were, I would literally fall asleep. It had been over 24 hours since first contraction, and at least 8 since my water broke, and I really was exhausted. Whoever was in there, when I fell asleep, would tell me to wake up because they were afraid I would slump over and hit my head on the tub. But back to the main point, God, the living and real and powerful God, the one who hears when His children cry out to Him, was with me and lovingly giving me everything I needed to successfully labor! I could have possibly labored without my support team, but there is no way I could have done it without my Savior.
3 hours after getting into the tub I asked the MW's assistant what was going to happen next. I needed to know because I needed to know that I wasn't going to feel that much pain for too much longer. With a kind and confident smile she told me, "Next the baby comes." I than asked her what else I could do, because I had had enough of being in the tub.
By 5 am I was back in the bed room, and told the MW's assistant that I felt like I needed to push. She checked me and said I was 9 cm with that same small lip, but go ahead and do what felt naturally (thank you! This is one of the reasons I wanted a home birth, 'do what feels natural to do' - thank you!) She also felt for the baby's position and he had turned! Praise God!
I started pushing, and they woke everyone up. My mom was the only one who had stayed awake the entirety of my labor with me, but I am glad that the rest had gotten a little sleep.
5:30 - I pushed and out came a green'ish colored fluid. It immediately put up a red flag for my MW. Fortunately I didn't know green fluid meant meconium, nor did I even see it because my eyes were closed. In a calm voice my MW asked me not to push until she could put the monitors over my belly. Still I had no idea about the green fluid. The baby's heart beat was good and strong, except for when I pushed. I would push, his heart beat would sink, and than it took a very long time to return to where it should be. They began switching my positions. I started upright, and would squat down with someone pushing my hips into eachother. We than moved me on the floor on hands and knees. And than on my side, and than on my back, anything that would help the baby through me pushing. Eventually my MW just told me, "don't push on the next contraction". For all your mom's who have done this naturally, can you imagine being told that? I said I couldn't, she said she just wanted to see how the baby handled the contraction when I didn't push with it. Fortunately whenever I did not push, and just heavily breathed through the contraction, he was fine. Than she said, "ok go ahead and push on the next one". I pushed and the heart beat plummeted further, and struggled to return. We did this sequence one more time before she told me to stop pushing, and she was calling the ambulance.
The fire truck was there in like 5 minutes. They tried to IV me, all the while I am breathing in oxygen, which my MW put on me for the baby's sake, and blowing it out like a horse does when he waves his lips in the air.
The ambulance was there with in a half hour, and would have been sooner but someone in a more stressful situation needed them first. They came, loaded me up on the stretcher, ran me outside, my hubby hopped in the front and we were on our way. At one point I asked the very kind gentleman inside if I was going to have to have a C-sec. Of course he told me he didn't know, and that they were taking me to L&D. Than I felt the ambulance stop. I knew that we weren't at the hospital yet, so I asked, "I didn't know ambulances stopped at stop lights?" He told me, "Pregnancy isn't imminent" I had never heard that word before, but I immediately knew what he meant. I was not in an 'emergency' situation, and there fore we stopped at stop lights. I also asked him why there wasn't any sirens. Shortly after that they turned them on and sped up the pace. I think they began to feel sorry for me, I was quite the mess.
We arrived at the hospital and I was met with one of the kindest and most gentle smiles I had ever seen, Marylee, my nurse.
My support team arrived shortly thereafter and piled in the room. There were at least 6 hospital staff, and 6 people from my support team, so 12 people watched me give birth to my son. It is a very good thing that when you get to that point you no longer care who is in the room. I really would have been embarrassed had that been the same scene, 12 hours earlier.
They laid me on my back, started putting the equipment on, and transfered my IV, all while I was still breathing like a banshee. Than after being there for about 5 minutes I asked them what they wanted me to do. I was told that on the next contraction, go ahead and push - such sweet music to my ears! I had been told for the last hour, 'don't push'. Now I was finally getting the chance to let go of all that built up energy and push! So as the words, 'go ahead and push' were coming out of their mouth, I pushed with the force of a cannon ball coming out of a cannon. It must have done something big, because the next thing I heard was, 'prepping for an episiotomy'. I'm assuming the baby must have been crowning, and I'm sure someone told me this, but all I could hear was that dreaded 'E' word. No sooner had I heard it I turned to my MW and in desperation yelled, "M------ I don't want an episiotomy!", to which she replied, "Hunny if I were delivering this baby, I would do an episiotomy" (later I found out that the reason she said this was because she knew it was a big baby, and because he wasn't coming out so quickly/easily). I looked down at the Dr. and I watched something immediately change in his thought process. He was looking at the MW, put down the scapple, and began stretching me. Now I don't know if he heard me, or my MW's response, but either way, something made him change his mind, and I am ever so grateful!
I pushed, baby's head crowned, I pushed, baby's head came out, they stuck the tube down (he bit the Dr.'s finger when this happened), sucked out the meconium, pushed a few more times and with in 15 minutes of arriving at the hospital my beautiful son was born.
Now that was the most amazing feeling I had ever felt. Not for any reason except the immense relief that I didn't have to be in labor, anymore.
I didn't get to hold him right away, and forever I will morn that moment. They clamped and cut the cord and within 5 minutes were giving me a shot of pit. and literally pulling out the placenta. The Dr. looked at it, saw nothing was wrong, and than it was gone.
My son was just a few feet off, sitting under a bright light, crying, aggressively throwing his arms and legs around, and I laid in the bed, unable to even figure out what now was going on. They let me kiss his cheek before they took him away to the infant room - the softest cheek I have ever felt. They x-rayed his chest, and gave him some antibiotics for the Group B Strep.
While the baby was away I looked outside to notice that the sun had begun to rise. When I saw it, I was so puzzled that I had to ask, "why is the sun coming up at night?" Than I was told that it wasn't night, any longer, it was 7:30 in the morning. Which than made me think, wow, what an amazing way to start the day! What an incredible example of starting a new life, one with a new little person in our lives.
An hour or so later they brought him back and I finally got to look at his beautiful face, and smell his sweet skin. His daddy had gone with him, and stayed with him, right next to him the whole time he was away. Than baby, daddy, and I enjoyed our first few moments of being a family. It was a beautiful time, all three of us bonding.
I know I did not get to have my full home birth, but I did get as much out of it that I possibly could, considering the circumstances.
When the MW and I talked later, I learned the reasons why she felt it necessary to call 911. She said that although he had been doing so good for so long, something changed when I pushed. She said it could have been an elbow to the groin, a little too much 'squished' feeling, or something more serious, but whatever it was that happened, it scared my son so badly that he pooped his pants. She said it was the type of meconium that set off 'alarms', and the fact that he was working hard to conserve his oxygen after I pushed, that made her call the ambulance. When he came out at 9 lbs, 2 oz's, 21 in' long, and scoring 8's on is apgars, we now know that he probably wasn't really in danger, but it was more than likely a position problem for him, (ie. elbow to the groin, or something along those lines). Of course we had no way of knowing that before he came, so alas, we had to make the transfer.
Going away from this whole experience I have learned many things. 1) I loved laboring at home, 2) but I don't know if I can handle it again 3) but I didn't much care for how I was taken care of in the hospital 4) so I will probably bear the pain, and have a homebirth on the next baby
I hope that this rather long story is in some way, a help, or an encouragement to one of you ladies. I know that I wasn't against having my son in a hospital, so when we had to make the transfer, I thought that it was ironic. Unfortunately many of the people around me are even more against homebirths after hearing that mine didn't happen that way, but hey, this is what God wanted for our family, and I am blessed to have such an amazing story with a happy ending. I just hope to change their perspectives when the next baby comes along
My son was 'due' December 24th, but other than BH, there were no signs labor was soon approaching. Finally on the morning of Jan. 2nd I woke up with a bit of show. I was so excited I immediately called my MW and doula! They both were greatly encouraged, seeing how this first baby of mine was taking awhile to show any signs that he would actually come out.
By 7, that night, I felt my first real contraction. My DH and I were watching a movie while I bounced around on the exercise ball, (baby was turned around and face up). I didn't tell him right away, but waited about a half an hour to see if these ones were the real deal. When I told him, my DH was so excited he said that we needed to call my mom, who lives in AK, and tell her to catch the next flight! I told him we needed to time them first, than call the MW, than if after we talked she thinks this was real labor, maybe than call my mom.
7:30 we started timing them and the time between was by no means consistent, but they were still coming! *thank the Lord*! We called the MW, she said it sounded like labor, told me to call my mom, and try to get some sleep.
I tried to lay down in the bed but there was a terrible constant pain in my lower back. So instead I sat upright on the couch and tried my best to sleep. I did pretty well, though every once in awhile a really strong contraction would rudely awaken me
By 8 the next day, (the 3rd), my in-laws were picking up my mom from the airport and coming back to our place. My mom rushed into the apartment, gave me a BIG kiss on the head and I instantly felt as though I could now have my baby.
We were planning on having the baby out our doula/friend's house, so we packed everything up and by 10:30 a.m. were on our way. At this point contractions were getting stronger, but I could talk through 96% of them.
We arrived at my doula's, and began setting everything up.
Timed contractions again and by the afternoon they were about 6 - 7 min. apart, and still totally bearable. I mean so much so that I even thought, 'well if this is labor, I am definitely made to have babies!' Little did I know, the tough stuff just hadn't showed up yet
My wonderful support team, (minus the MW, she didn't come until about 6 pm), took wonderful care of me during this super easy part of labor. I mean they were awesome at distracting me from the pain, talking with me, checking on me, feeding me, and making me go to the bathroom every hour on the hour.
About 3 we timed contractions again. They had spread out a little, but were getting more powerful. The spasm in my back also continued to get more intense. My support team were taking turns trying desperately to get the muscle to calm down, but all their efforts only aggravated it more. When this first began I thought it was back labor, but after I described it to my MW, she said that it was just some lumbar muscle that I must have strained sometime before labor began. Needless to say, I was not so happy about this added pain.
3:30 the whole house decided to take a nap. I tried also, but contractions were now strong enough that I could not sleep. I could still enjoy the company of other's, so I sat up with my doula and she prayed over my back. I think I remember it letting up a little, but not for long.
During all this the baby was still not rotating.
6 p.m. (ish), my MW arrives and decides she wants to check me. Because of testing pos. for Group B Strep, this was the first time I had been checked during this pregnancy. Amazingly I was already 100% effaced and at a "stretchable" 6 cm. My MW was impressed. She said that whatever my body had been doing for the weeks leading up to actual labor, had worked! I was pretty impressed too, seeing how labor still really wasn't hurting and I was more than half way there to having my baby. While checking me she tried her best to turn the baby, but he wouldn't budge. She also predicted he would be about 8-14, and said I had "plenty" of room to have this baby. She strapped me to the monitors, and baby's heart beat was strong, before, during, and after, contractions. There were no worries what-so-ever, this baby and his mama were doing great!
After she checked me, we sat down to have a little talk about the distance my doula's home was from the nearest hospital. Unknowingly we were planning to have this baby about 20 miles from any hospital, a distance that was just not comfortable for my MW. So after talking, I decided to take us all back to mine and DH's apartment. Also during our hour long conversation labor suddenly became more intense than anything I had ever felt before. My legs began to shake and I rocked my hips back and forth while holding fastly to the bed post. I also started breathing deeper and with more intention than before. It was good that I was warned this was going to happen, seeing how my MW had said that checking me was probably going to speed up labor. To that all I can say, "um. Yes it did!"
So while everyone was eating dinner, my wonderful DH announced, for me, that we were going to head back to our place. My support team, again showing me how wonderful they were, quickly re-packed everything and put it, and me, in the car. The ride back was quite a bit more difficult than the ride out. DH hit a couple of bumps that made me cringe a bit, but that was unfortunate seeing how it only seemed to happen right at the peak of a contraction
By 8:30 (ish) we were back home. I got down on hands and knees to try to get the baby to wiggle himself free from his unfavorable position. My mom popped in a DVD slideshow of pictures from the brother's wedding that I had missed (due to being too close to due day), and my water broke. I was rocking my hips and felt a huge contraction. With the contraction came a intense pressure. At first I thought the pressure was gas, and I was mortified that I might 'fart' in front of all these people, (yes I am that kind of a women that no one, and I mean NO ONE, hears me toot - which is what I prefer to call it). At the peak of the contraction and pressure feeling, and me with a scared look of pain and embarrassment, a big huge gush of water came flowing. I told everyone that it was the most amazing feeling I had ever felt before in my life, and well, it was, at least up until the part when the baby came out.
They quickly helped me out of my laboring pajamas and started the bath. I wasn't sure if I was having the baby in the water, but I at least wanted to be in it since I knew labor was just about to get a whole lot harder.
At 9 (ish) I got into the tub, and from about there on than on out, all things are a blur of time, faces, and pain. At some point during being in the tub I was given cut up apples with peanut butter, on a plate. I don't even think I ate one of the slices, (such a waste!), because later I saw a picture & it was put aside and it looked like everything was still on it from when it was given to me.
About 10 they got me out the tub to go to the bathroom again. I would have to admit that going to the bathroom, during labor, was one of my least favorite memories. For some reason it just made all the pain that much worse whenever I had to squat down to meet the toilet. After that not working out, they helped me change into something dry and than my mom lead me the 5 feet from the bathroom to the bedroom. Now contractions were definitely strong enough that without her strong arms holding me up, I would not have been able to walk to the bedroom.
In the bed room they started me trying lots of different positions to get the baby to move. He was not only backwards, but also higher than they would have liked to see this far into labor.
With my hubby in front of me, his knees on the ground, leaning forward on to the bed, I got on my hands and knees and held tightly unto his hands. This was probably my favorite memory from labor. Though it was hard, and everything a blur, as long as my husband was right there, right in front of me with his forehead against mine, I felt I could handle the pain. Later we moved to me sitting on the bed, on my knees, & sort of propped up against him while he sat on the exercise ball behind me, this I also liked. They checked me again and though it had only been a couple hours since my water broke, I was 9 cm with just a lip - anytime now! In fact they thought for sure I would have the baby by midnight.
Midnight of Jan. 4th rolls around and we're still doing the same dance, propped up against my hubby. My MW asked me if I wanted to get up and go pee again, but seeing how I hadn't been having any luck with that, she asked if I would prefer to do a catheter. And seeing how I absolutely despised trying to sit on the toilet, I opted for the cath. Unfortunately it didn't quite work out, because the baby's head was sitting on my urethra. My MW said that she could feel the tube hitting his head as she tried to put it in, and it just couldn't push past it. We did our best, though, and my bladder emptied a little, but I still had quite the pooch of what would not come out. By this time the baby had finally moved a little, now he was sideways, but she couldn't tell which way he was facing. He had so much hair that my MW could not find the fontanel line.
So they threw me back in the tub, this time with all the lights off, no people around, and me with my back pressed against the wall and my legs up, as if they were in stir ups. My MW sat in front of me and helped me hold my position by being the brace I pressed my feet against. She said this was a sure fire way of getting the baby to turn the rest of the way because my hips were most open in this position. I have to tell you though, it was extremely painful. I don't know if that was the case because of the awkwardness of the position, or because the baby was moving, or because now I was in the transition faze and nothing seemed to be happening, but regardless, during this time is when I felt as though I could not handle anymore. Later my husband came in and I told him that I thought I needed to go to the hospital because I needed an epidural. Being the wonderful, and practical, man that he is, he loving encouraged me that I "could do this".
My MW also helped me during this time by talking me through what I was feeling, and what was now happening in my body. She would tell me to just relax every muscle in my body, all the muscles that are not needed for getting the baby out, let your arms go limp, release the tension in your back, and breath deep. She told me to work with the baby, feel him turning inside, try to help him turn by relaxing everything. If it had not been for her in there to talk me through that part, I know for certain I would have had them call the ambulance, it really was that unbearable.
Now I must give glory to God at this point, because He really was with me through every single step of the way. I felt His presence holding me up, strengthening and encouraging me through out the entire labor. At this point in the tub my contractions were pretty much back to back, and so overwhelmingly powerful that in my mind I would cry out to God and ask Him for give me a break. I would cry out, and He would respond. Everytime I asked for a break, He gave it to me. It was like He was saying, "I am right here my beloved, I'm not leaving you alone in this very difficult place. Here is a break, so that you can re-gain your strength and continue on." During these breaks, however long they were, I would literally fall asleep. It had been over 24 hours since first contraction, and at least 8 since my water broke, and I really was exhausted. Whoever was in there, when I fell asleep, would tell me to wake up because they were afraid I would slump over and hit my head on the tub. But back to the main point, God, the living and real and powerful God, the one who hears when His children cry out to Him, was with me and lovingly giving me everything I needed to successfully labor! I could have possibly labored without my support team, but there is no way I could have done it without my Savior.
3 hours after getting into the tub I asked the MW's assistant what was going to happen next. I needed to know because I needed to know that I wasn't going to feel that much pain for too much longer. With a kind and confident smile she told me, "Next the baby comes." I than asked her what else I could do, because I had had enough of being in the tub.
By 5 am I was back in the bed room, and told the MW's assistant that I felt like I needed to push. She checked me and said I was 9 cm with that same small lip, but go ahead and do what felt naturally (thank you! This is one of the reasons I wanted a home birth, 'do what feels natural to do' - thank you!) She also felt for the baby's position and he had turned! Praise God!
I started pushing, and they woke everyone up. My mom was the only one who had stayed awake the entirety of my labor with me, but I am glad that the rest had gotten a little sleep.
5:30 - I pushed and out came a green'ish colored fluid. It immediately put up a red flag for my MW. Fortunately I didn't know green fluid meant meconium, nor did I even see it because my eyes were closed. In a calm voice my MW asked me not to push until she could put the monitors over my belly. Still I had no idea about the green fluid. The baby's heart beat was good and strong, except for when I pushed. I would push, his heart beat would sink, and than it took a very long time to return to where it should be. They began switching my positions. I started upright, and would squat down with someone pushing my hips into eachother. We than moved me on the floor on hands and knees. And than on my side, and than on my back, anything that would help the baby through me pushing. Eventually my MW just told me, "don't push on the next contraction". For all your mom's who have done this naturally, can you imagine being told that? I said I couldn't, she said she just wanted to see how the baby handled the contraction when I didn't push with it. Fortunately whenever I did not push, and just heavily breathed through the contraction, he was fine. Than she said, "ok go ahead and push on the next one". I pushed and the heart beat plummeted further, and struggled to return. We did this sequence one more time before she told me to stop pushing, and she was calling the ambulance.
The fire truck was there in like 5 minutes. They tried to IV me, all the while I am breathing in oxygen, which my MW put on me for the baby's sake, and blowing it out like a horse does when he waves his lips in the air.
The ambulance was there with in a half hour, and would have been sooner but someone in a more stressful situation needed them first. They came, loaded me up on the stretcher, ran me outside, my hubby hopped in the front and we were on our way. At one point I asked the very kind gentleman inside if I was going to have to have a C-sec. Of course he told me he didn't know, and that they were taking me to L&D. Than I felt the ambulance stop. I knew that we weren't at the hospital yet, so I asked, "I didn't know ambulances stopped at stop lights?" He told me, "Pregnancy isn't imminent" I had never heard that word before, but I immediately knew what he meant. I was not in an 'emergency' situation, and there fore we stopped at stop lights. I also asked him why there wasn't any sirens. Shortly after that they turned them on and sped up the pace. I think they began to feel sorry for me, I was quite the mess.
We arrived at the hospital and I was met with one of the kindest and most gentle smiles I had ever seen, Marylee, my nurse.
My support team arrived shortly thereafter and piled in the room. There were at least 6 hospital staff, and 6 people from my support team, so 12 people watched me give birth to my son. It is a very good thing that when you get to that point you no longer care who is in the room. I really would have been embarrassed had that been the same scene, 12 hours earlier.
They laid me on my back, started putting the equipment on, and transfered my IV, all while I was still breathing like a banshee. Than after being there for about 5 minutes I asked them what they wanted me to do. I was told that on the next contraction, go ahead and push - such sweet music to my ears! I had been told for the last hour, 'don't push'. Now I was finally getting the chance to let go of all that built up energy and push! So as the words, 'go ahead and push' were coming out of their mouth, I pushed with the force of a cannon ball coming out of a cannon. It must have done something big, because the next thing I heard was, 'prepping for an episiotomy'. I'm assuming the baby must have been crowning, and I'm sure someone told me this, but all I could hear was that dreaded 'E' word. No sooner had I heard it I turned to my MW and in desperation yelled, "M------ I don't want an episiotomy!", to which she replied, "Hunny if I were delivering this baby, I would do an episiotomy" (later I found out that the reason she said this was because she knew it was a big baby, and because he wasn't coming out so quickly/easily). I looked down at the Dr. and I watched something immediately change in his thought process. He was looking at the MW, put down the scapple, and began stretching me. Now I don't know if he heard me, or my MW's response, but either way, something made him change his mind, and I am ever so grateful!
I pushed, baby's head crowned, I pushed, baby's head came out, they stuck the tube down (he bit the Dr.'s finger when this happened), sucked out the meconium, pushed a few more times and with in 15 minutes of arriving at the hospital my beautiful son was born.
Now that was the most amazing feeling I had ever felt. Not for any reason except the immense relief that I didn't have to be in labor, anymore.
I didn't get to hold him right away, and forever I will morn that moment. They clamped and cut the cord and within 5 minutes were giving me a shot of pit. and literally pulling out the placenta. The Dr. looked at it, saw nothing was wrong, and than it was gone.
My son was just a few feet off, sitting under a bright light, crying, aggressively throwing his arms and legs around, and I laid in the bed, unable to even figure out what now was going on. They let me kiss his cheek before they took him away to the infant room - the softest cheek I have ever felt. They x-rayed his chest, and gave him some antibiotics for the Group B Strep.
While the baby was away I looked outside to notice that the sun had begun to rise. When I saw it, I was so puzzled that I had to ask, "why is the sun coming up at night?" Than I was told that it wasn't night, any longer, it was 7:30 in the morning. Which than made me think, wow, what an amazing way to start the day! What an incredible example of starting a new life, one with a new little person in our lives.
An hour or so later they brought him back and I finally got to look at his beautiful face, and smell his sweet skin. His daddy had gone with him, and stayed with him, right next to him the whole time he was away. Than baby, daddy, and I enjoyed our first few moments of being a family. It was a beautiful time, all three of us bonding.
I know I did not get to have my full home birth, but I did get as much out of it that I possibly could, considering the circumstances.
When the MW and I talked later, I learned the reasons why she felt it necessary to call 911. She said that although he had been doing so good for so long, something changed when I pushed. She said it could have been an elbow to the groin, a little too much 'squished' feeling, or something more serious, but whatever it was that happened, it scared my son so badly that he pooped his pants. She said it was the type of meconium that set off 'alarms', and the fact that he was working hard to conserve his oxygen after I pushed, that made her call the ambulance. When he came out at 9 lbs, 2 oz's, 21 in' long, and scoring 8's on is apgars, we now know that he probably wasn't really in danger, but it was more than likely a position problem for him, (ie. elbow to the groin, or something along those lines). Of course we had no way of knowing that before he came, so alas, we had to make the transfer.
Going away from this whole experience I have learned many things. 1) I loved laboring at home, 2) but I don't know if I can handle it again 3) but I didn't much care for how I was taken care of in the hospital 4) so I will probably bear the pain, and have a homebirth on the next baby
I hope that this rather long story is in some way, a help, or an encouragement to one of you ladies. I know that I wasn't against having my son in a hospital, so when we had to make the transfer, I thought that it was ironic. Unfortunately many of the people around me are even more against homebirths after hearing that mine didn't happen that way, but hey, this is what God wanted for our family, and I am blessed to have such an amazing story with a happy ending. I just hope to change their perspectives when the next baby comes along
Wednesday, November 25, 2009
My brain is melting....
....from all the amazing things I've been learning today!!!
BTW, where is the cool fonts, and other things that used to be available when posting? I hope that blogger hasn't down graded us who aren't paying for their site.
But back to what my brain is melting about.
Monday night we were in our Heart for Ministry class, going through the book of Acts, when a question came up about the Holy Spirit. I can't remember the question exactly, but the discussion basically revolved around whether or not receiving the Holy Spirit, (as in the baptism of the H.S.), happens at conversion, or at a later time.
So I sat my self down at the comp., opened up Josh's bible software program, and my Bible, and began to read through the book of Acts.
In my notebook I posed three questions:
1) When a person is saved, do the receive the H.S. at that same time?
2) If that is the case, what does the Bible mean when the H.S. 'falls upon' or 'fills' a person?
3) What is/are the result(s) of the H.S. doing these things? (ie.: 'falling upon', 'filling', a person 'receiving', 'pouring out upon', etc.)
I than spent the rest of the day, up until about an hour ago, searching just through Acts to see if these questions could be answered.
After several pages of notes, I have come to the conclusion that indeed the gifting of the Holy Spirit is a separate event from a person being saved. Now I must tell you, this completely rocks my mind, and for one solid reason: not only do we receive Jesus and are baptized in His name, but we are also given another gift, the gift of the Holy Spirit to empower our lives to share the good news of the gospel. I mean seriously, do we need any other gifts other than salvation? Already we don't deserve that! But than for God to be so gracious as to give us His Holy Spirit to enable us to go and do the things He has created us to do....ah its just too much!
I also learned that the words used for describing how the gift is delivered, really doesn't make a difference. Before searching all this out, I wondered if a person received the H.S. first, (when they were saved), and than later, (at God's appointed time), the H.S. would come upon them in a different way, empowering them to do His good works. Well it turns out that I don't know how the H.S. works in the life of a new believer who has yet to be baptized in the H.S., but I do know that whenever they use the words 'receive' or 'filled', or phrases like 'fell upon', or 'poured out', in the book of Acts, its all pointing to the same event: The Holy Spirit has come to empower a believer to do things that beforehand were not possible for them to do.
In answer to the 3rd question, I found out that SO many things happen when the H.S. is poured out on the believer. Sometimes people would speak in tongues afterwards, others would prophesy, some saw visions and dreamed dreams, many were given boldness to preach the gospel and stand up to the religious leaders even though they faced certain persecution, and some were enabled to perform signs and wonders of healing and raising the dead back to life. Basically all pretty incredible stuff, stuff that I believe God still wants to be doing in us today.
And with that last statement, my mind begins to wonder if the reason we often don't see these things happening is because we believers are not being baptized in the Holy Spirit? I mean if it is by this baptism that all these things happen, and none before in the individual, shouldn't we eagerly desire to also be baptized in the H.S.?
Thinking that also brought another thought to my mind. If that is the case, have I been baptized in the Holy Spirit? Is the reason I lack the boldness to share Christ with other because I have yet to receive this gift? Is the reason that I am afraid of persecution because I have yet to have the Holy Spirit poured out on me? I must tell you, I do not know. I feel I may know the answer, but I also think I must spend more time in prayer before I know for certain. Whatever the answer turns out being this much I know is true....I do NOT want to be an ineffective christian. A person who goes to church on Sunday, and during the week locks myself up in my apartment where I am comfortable and safe.
I wish so much that I could share in more detail what God has shown me, but in all honesty, Its still sinking in for me at this time.
If you have any questions about this, please ask me! Like I said I have lots of notes, and if anyone is interested, I will share them with you.
God bless you and I pray He intrigues your heart so that you seek out the things of God that are still a mystery to you.
BTW, where is the cool fonts, and other things that used to be available when posting? I hope that blogger hasn't down graded us who aren't paying for their site.
But back to what my brain is melting about.
Monday night we were in our Heart for Ministry class, going through the book of Acts, when a question came up about the Holy Spirit. I can't remember the question exactly, but the discussion basically revolved around whether or not receiving the Holy Spirit, (as in the baptism of the H.S.), happens at conversion, or at a later time.
So I sat my self down at the comp., opened up Josh's bible software program, and my Bible, and began to read through the book of Acts.
In my notebook I posed three questions:
1) When a person is saved, do the receive the H.S. at that same time?
2) If that is the case, what does the Bible mean when the H.S. 'falls upon' or 'fills' a person?
3) What is/are the result(s) of the H.S. doing these things? (ie.: 'falling upon', 'filling', a person 'receiving', 'pouring out upon', etc.)
I than spent the rest of the day, up until about an hour ago, searching just through Acts to see if these questions could be answered.
After several pages of notes, I have come to the conclusion that indeed the gifting of the Holy Spirit is a separate event from a person being saved. Now I must tell you, this completely rocks my mind, and for one solid reason: not only do we receive Jesus and are baptized in His name, but we are also given another gift, the gift of the Holy Spirit to empower our lives to share the good news of the gospel. I mean seriously, do we need any other gifts other than salvation? Already we don't deserve that! But than for God to be so gracious as to give us His Holy Spirit to enable us to go and do the things He has created us to do....ah its just too much!
I also learned that the words used for describing how the gift is delivered, really doesn't make a difference. Before searching all this out, I wondered if a person received the H.S. first, (when they were saved), and than later, (at God's appointed time), the H.S. would come upon them in a different way, empowering them to do His good works. Well it turns out that I don't know how the H.S. works in the life of a new believer who has yet to be baptized in the H.S., but I do know that whenever they use the words 'receive' or 'filled', or phrases like 'fell upon', or 'poured out', in the book of Acts, its all pointing to the same event: The Holy Spirit has come to empower a believer to do things that beforehand were not possible for them to do.
In answer to the 3rd question, I found out that SO many things happen when the H.S. is poured out on the believer. Sometimes people would speak in tongues afterwards, others would prophesy, some saw visions and dreamed dreams, many were given boldness to preach the gospel and stand up to the religious leaders even though they faced certain persecution, and some were enabled to perform signs and wonders of healing and raising the dead back to life. Basically all pretty incredible stuff, stuff that I believe God still wants to be doing in us today.
And with that last statement, my mind begins to wonder if the reason we often don't see these things happening is because we believers are not being baptized in the Holy Spirit? I mean if it is by this baptism that all these things happen, and none before in the individual, shouldn't we eagerly desire to also be baptized in the H.S.?
Thinking that also brought another thought to my mind. If that is the case, have I been baptized in the Holy Spirit? Is the reason I lack the boldness to share Christ with other because I have yet to receive this gift? Is the reason that I am afraid of persecution because I have yet to have the Holy Spirit poured out on me? I must tell you, I do not know. I feel I may know the answer, but I also think I must spend more time in prayer before I know for certain. Whatever the answer turns out being this much I know is true....I do NOT want to be an ineffective christian. A person who goes to church on Sunday, and during the week locks myself up in my apartment where I am comfortable and safe.
I wish so much that I could share in more detail what God has shown me, but in all honesty, Its still sinking in for me at this time.
If you have any questions about this, please ask me! Like I said I have lots of notes, and if anyone is interested, I will share them with you.
God bless you and I pray He intrigues your heart so that you seek out the things of God that are still a mystery to you.
Friday, November 20, 2009
Counting down the days...
I'm just counting down the days, now, until our little man gets here.
I am a little bit surprised at how quickly time is going by, now that I'm not working. I thought for sure that it was going to drag. I think its because I've been keeping busy with so many things that well, it just hasn't had time to slow down much yet! My 'to do' list is still rather long... but I'm ok with that. Of course other things have come up as being more important than things on that darn list. For example: the gathering of things necessary for home birth, like; cotton sheets, umbilical cord clamps, a knit baby hat, flexible straws, a 9 volt battery... I mean just the really obviously basic needs for a home birth, (haha yeah right!). Anyways the shopping around has been fun. I'm just getting so stinkin' excited that December is right around the corner! Though I keep assuming this baby will be a New years baby, I would not be disappointed in the least bit if he came before Christmas. In fact, if I keep looking at all his cute stuff, I will probably find it really difficult to wait if he goes past his due date. O well though! How can I not sit in his room and just look around at all this stuff just waiting for him when he comes out? I mean come on! But I digress...
In other O'Donnell news, Josh is scheduled for a knee surgery on the 2nd. He pretty much re-injured an old injury, but this time he injured it bad enough to completely tear his ACL. (So then again, maybe I don't want Jr. to come early, since his daddy will most certainly need all the time he can get for healing.) If you think of him, please pray for Josh's surgery. And please also pray that God would heal him with out needing the surgery. I'm hopeful that God will do this, so if others are praying the same, I would love it!
The baby had his shower last Friday, and with quite the turn out! Its so exciting to see that there are so many incredible & loving women around him! It just makes me so excited when I think about raising him at this church, (the majority of women there were ones from our fellowship), because I know these women will so genuinely love him :) Here are a couple pictures from the night:
I know they aren't great quality, and no one is paying attention to the camera person, but I figure that is ok and I can still show them :)
Josh and I recently had our two year anniversary, *woohoo*, and since we had no plans made for the day, it worked out perfectly when our good friend Krista asked us if she could take my pregnancy pics.
Its unfortunate how fuzzy they look on here, but you at least get the idea of how nice they turned out :) There are lots and lots more, but these ones are probably my favorites...at least for now they are.
Hope you all are having a blessed day! Don't forget Psalm 46:10, "Be still and know that I AM God", as you go about your business.
:)
Sunday, November 1, 2009
I'm a terrible blogger...
But in all honesty, does that even need to be said anymore?
Anyways....
I just wanted to, again, update on some happenings. These ones are from this morning :)
God is still doing amazing things around here, (as if He ever stops!)
This morning, as I reluctantly crawled out of bed, I again found myself thinking that I wanted to quit being a jr. high leader. I often struggle with these thoughts, but have suspiciously discovered that I think them only on Sunday mornings, before the jr. high service begins. So of course it only makes sense that these nasty thoughts would be most invasive during morning prayer with all the other leaders. Up until prayer time, I was also thinking on the prior evening, and how sorely irritated I had felt, (of course my irritation was not caused by anything from my immediate surroundings. I simply had not prepared myself before the battle). Josh doesn't know this, but I was up for quite awhile after he had gone to sleep because I stubbornly would not let go of my pride and humbly ask God to take away my irritation.
But going back to this morning, and prayer time...
As we were all sitting in our little group, Josh went and did something totally unspeakable; he asked us to pray that God would cleanse our hearts of anything that shouldn't be in there, before going and ministering to the kids.
Of course I am than thinking, "Um so does that mean that you want me to stop selfishly thinking about myself and consider what God might actually want for me?" I mean I knew what the right answer was, but at first, I so did not want to do it.
Needless to say, I knew I would be utterly useless if I did not confess my sins and ask God to purge my being of anything nasty inside. So in prayer, before my brothers and sisters in Christ, I confessed my sins, and while doing so another little prayer slipped out of my mouth,
"LORD please help us to love on these kids"
You ever find yourself shocked when God answers one of your prayers, especially if it was one that when you said it, you really didn't put much thought into before it came out of your mouth? That was what this prayer was.
(now I'm going to side track a moment, but stay with me, I'll come back to this in a moment)
I felt God's compassion as He erased my sins of last night, but still found my mind struggling with the thought of leaving jr. high. I was rationalizing all the 'right' reasons for me to leave. I mean I am expecting, I'll have to think of my child soon and not have time for being in this ministry. I was looking at the fruits of my ministry and began to wonder, 'Am I doing this without God's blessing? Does He want me in this place anymore? Do the girls even get anything out of our small group? Am I hindering His work in their lives?' The thoughts were invading my brain, and really distracting me from our time of worship. So I said to myself, (and to God), 'I will not worry about this anymore. If God is calling me away, than when He does so, He will tell me.' I also believe that if you are unsure of whether or not God is calling you away from a ministry, the best thing to do is to STAY in that ministry until you hear from Him on where to go next. It is all too easy to feel strong emotions that make us believe that God is telling us to do something, when really He is not. I don't know if that is right, but as of now, I feel that is good counsel.
Josh gave his message, and than the dreaded moment came, small group discussion time.
This really isn't the most horrible thing in the world, but when you've been having thoughts like I had been having, being in this group with all those young faces looking up at you is a little bit intimidating.
The discussions were going well, (at least I felt they were), girls were sharing, we were talking, I was hoping they were understanding the real life applications of the message, and then my dear Emily shared with us how her Saturday went.
Emily, and her dad, do not have a very happy relationship as of late. In fact, during the past year plus that I've know Emily, her relationship with her dad has been a hard one. I know I can only take what she says with a grain of salt, seeing how I do not know the other side of the story, but from all that she says, her dad is a big meany.
On Saturday, (as of right now, yesterday), they had another one of their verbal confrontations, and as Emily told us about it the skin around her eyes began to turn red, and than within moments tears were flooding her vision.
This is when God unexpectedly answered my prayer, "LORD help us to love on these kids"
The instant I saw the torment in her face, my heart was stricken with unsurpassed grief.
You see, Emily asks for prayer a lot for her dad, and their relationship. So to see that things weren't, so far, getting any better, just completely broke my heart.
After the group was over, I turned to Emily and began to talk to her about her relationship with her dad, and than asked her about her relationship with God.
(My heart is still breaking for her now.)
I asked her, in regards to her relationship with God, if she was feeling any disappointment in Him because she didn't feel like He was answering her prayers. Unfortunately she said yes, and than went on to say, 'it is sometimes hard to believe God is merciful when this keeps happening'.
What do you say to a young girl when she says this??? I mean I KNOW God is hearing her prayers, but how to I tell her that how God answers them is a mystery? But that is exactly what I did tell her. I also tried to remind her that He DOES hear her prayers, and will answer them.
Maybe God is preparing her for something in her future, I don't know.
But it is so hard to watch a beautiful young lady, tormented by her emotions about her and her dad's relationship, and have no magic prayer that instantly makes it all better.
I didn't say it was going to be a happy post,
but I will say that even though God answered my prayer from this morning
in ways that I wasn't expecting, I still am so thankful that He did.
Can you imagine what my time with Emily would have been like if I had not confessed my sins and humbled my heart to doing His will for my life? Or if I had not prayed for Him to fill our hearts with love for the kids? I have had conversations with her that took place while my heart was in that other place. They always go about with me having nothing to say, but worse yet, with me having no love in my heart for her hurting one.
It was, by far, the hardest morning I have ever had being in jr. high, both before prayer time and after. Yet it turned out to be one of the most rewarding.
I told Emily I will be praying for her and her dad this week. If the LORD puts them on your heart, after reading this, I will be thankful that others are praying too.
It had been such a long time since I've felt love like that for another person, who wasn't a family member, or very close friend. In that experience, though, I learned more about the amazing heart of God. He really does love deeper than we can fathom. I also learned that when you ask Him to do something, be it His will, He will let your heart break to answer that prayer.
I can honestly say that I love Emily, and my heart is broken for her in her situation.
I don't know if I will wonder next Sunday whether or not I should be involved with jr. high, but I feel that as long as Emily keeps coming, I want to be there. I know God has a victory in store for her, and I want to be with her to celebrate when it comes!
I know this is probably way longer than you were expecting to read, but I wanted to get this whole experience written down somewhere so that I could look back on it in the future and remember God's faithfulness to hear my prayers, and remember how He answered them.
The LORD bless you and keep you and make His face shine upon you, and your family :)
Monday, September 21, 2009
O boy it has been awhile...
I just wanted to give some quick updates, since I don't believe the world outside our little circle here knows much of what is happening in our lives these days, so here it is!
Beginning in August Josh began his new job as an intern at our church. His job entails pretty much anything anyone else would have to do being on salary there, only the benefit is his responsibility is much lower ;) Which I like because I think he gets a chance to grow a ton this way!
Just recently our youth pastor decided to give Josh the reigns to the Jr. High ministry. He said he wanted it to be Josh's thing and he would disciple him through the year. Pretty crazy! It is so good to know that God is in control of all this and that He will see Josh through this time as their teacher, (I don't think he is wanting the title 'pastor' yet, and I also suppose the whole responsibility thing jumped up a notch when this happened too).
Our baby boy is getting bigger and stronger all the time! He seems to be moving less these past few days, but I chalk it up to the nasty cold I'm fighting. I wish I could post up a pic. here of my belly now, but It will just have to wait :)
I want so much to have another ultra sound done, but alas, if it is not needed, it will not be 'ok'd' by the midwife, (did i do my 'ok'd' thing right there?). When I am not sick, he kicks and goes nuts in my womb! Josh and I picture him being a boxer when he grows up...of course I'm sure every mom thinks that about their little one when they do all that crazy fast moving around :)
My baby shower has officially been put into the planning stages! My awesome cousin Sheena is going to take care of it. So far the date is the 13th of November, (which also so happens to be a Friday. Its a good thing I'm not a superstitious person!)
My job is quickly on the ending side, and I'm really actually kind'a sad about that. I mean I am excited to get to be home and start doing stuff around here that never seems to get done, but still, I've grown to really love the people I work for, and the work I do. I do have the option of going back next year, but as of right now I'm just not sure how that would work out. I think the baby could come with me, but what if he is fuzzy, or worse, screaming when I have to answer the phone? I don't think that noise would sound too professional. Maybe this is something I should be praying about...
Our good friends Mo and Barbi are moving to Anchorage, Alaska with their two beautiful children :( Although I and Josh both are EXTREMELY bummed they are leaving, we also can't help but be SO EXCITED because it is so obviously the hand of God moving them there. Which reminds me, Jess, do you and Charley feel like meeting a couple of super awesome people and quite possibly becoming friends??? Just thought I'd play 'match maker' ;) since they won't know, well, probably anyone up there.
On the plus side, more people to come visit now! And more reasons to move up, (now if only God would be convinced that was the 'right' thing for us to do...haha ok actually I don't even know if that is funny to joke about, but God knows I'm kidding :)
Josh and I have begun the Heart for Ministry program at our church again. For those of you who do not know what it is, it is a year long 'extensive' study through the bible, (I put 'extensive' like that because I know it is not as extensive a study as it could be, but it is the most I've ever taken on), and this year we are going through the New Testament. Tonight was the second night of class, but because of my dumb cold, and at the time low grade fever, I decided to stay home and sweat this sucker out with some hot chicken noodle soup. Last week was awesome though, and I am SO bummed I missed tonight :( I hope Josh took lots of notes for us! We also listen through sermons given by Pastor Chuck Smith. This past week I benefitted so much from them, I feel I may just be alright missing tonight's class :)
Well the tiredness is beginning to return to my body, I think that is my que to go lay back down.
I hope this update finds you all in good health and in deep satisfaction in our LORD Jesus Christ! I heart you all!
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